Day 200: Shrooms and quarantine ?!!

Yep, you heard me. But first, I would like to make a clear disclaimer: Most of them are illegal, and for a reason. MANY of them will lead to addictive, self-destructive and sometimes deadly situations. As for the special class of Psychedelics, they can be dangerous if taken unsafely and without preparation, and can provideContinue reading “Day 200: Shrooms and quarantine ?!!”

Day 177: Will alcoholism kill my mom?

As I approach the 6 month mark, I am faced with a difficult piece of news. Last week I found out that my mother (a heavy alcoholic since as far back as I can remember) has recently developed alcohol induced hepatitis, or as she puts it… her liver is “very tired”. This is how IContinue reading “Day 177: Will alcoholism kill my mom?”

Day 140: Strength and fragility

Dearest WordPress friends,  My apologies for such a long absence. It’s not that I forgot about you or think I have this sobriety thing all figured out (oooooooh no…. believe me, I ain’t got nothing figured out !). It’s just that my dissertation chapter that was due on December 16th is STILL NOT FINISHED andContinue reading “Day 140: Strength and fragility”

Day 105: Survived “Family of alcoholics” gathering :)

Wow. I feel almost guilty for the title of this post, but I’m not going to sugar-coat my feelings so as to not upset my introjected parental figures, that would be insane ! 🙂  (I don’t think my real parents will ever read this blog) Anyway…. I made it ! My first family event sinceContinue reading “Day 105: Survived “Family of alcoholics” gathering :)”

Day 104: Paris, Paris, Paris!

Ah, the City of Lights, my old home. I landed yesterday and spent most of the day sleeping after a 15 hour flight (I took 3 different planes!). After years of living abroad and going back and forth across the globe I don’t know where my home is anymore. I have grown used to sayingContinue reading “Day 104: Paris, Paris, Paris!”

Day 97: Far from perfect! -Bye bye ego, hello shame!

These days I am under tremendous pressure work-wise: the third chapter of my PhD is due at the end of the week and I am nowhere near finished. This means I am putting in 10 hour long days, while battling very intense feelings of anxiety and discouragement, which (NO WORRIES!) is just part of theContinue reading “Day 97: Far from perfect! -Bye bye ego, hello shame!”

Day 94: Sober “work party” anniversary !

As I buckle up to face the holiday cravings and fears (yay my first Sober Xmas!!), here is a quick post to mention a “big” change that I hadn’t suspected and really surprised me this week. Three months ago, almost day for day, I flew back from France to the U.S.A, ready to take onContinue reading “Day 94: Sober “work party” anniversary !”

Day 80: Resuming “ordinary” struggles,

Long time no write, but I am back! Wow. I am going to hit the 3 month mark soon, which is both exhilarating and anxiety inducing. Initially (in great part to survive the first few weeks) I promised myself to do 3 months AF. Now that the deadline is approaching, I am positive that IContinue reading “Day 80: Resuming “ordinary” struggles,”

Day 62: Two Months, Holy sh***t!

I never would have imagined how deep the changes that have occurred during this AF journey would be. When I decided to sign up for the 3 month OYNB challenge and give up alcohol for “a bit”, I expected to experience some initial frustration and withdrawal, some emotional turmoil at the beginning, and then someContinue reading “Day 62: Two Months, Holy sh***t!”

Day 60: waking up to the love around us.

Coming up on two months. It feels good to be here. I feel solidly anchored in my body. I feel calmer. I feel proud of myself for learning how to navigate life sober. It has become normal, so I tend to forget that this is an achievement, that this took work. That I brought myselfContinue reading “Day 60: waking up to the love around us.”

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